I just want to take a shower in peace. Before the sentence had even fully formed in mind I was trying to erase it. "No! Don't think that! Don't be that Mom." Because when I used to hear Mom's say that I would think "But being a Mom is a calling - a very special calling - from God himself! How can you think you need a break from it? Why aren't you just enjoying every second of it?" I determined in my heart I would never allow myself to start thinking that way.
So I purposed to enjoy ever bit of Mommyhood. I enjoyed deciding what to feed the kids. I enjoyed picking out their clothes. I enjoyed making sure they got their vitamins. I enjoyed singing with them. I enjoyed teaching Jakki how to do little chores. I smiled when I cleaned up a mess because I know I am lucky to have children and be able to take care of them all day long. I smiled when they interrupted my work and my "me" time. And I even smiled when little voices called through the shower curtain.
I love being a Mommy. So why would that thought find it's way into my mind? I didn't like it. It made me feel guilty. It made me feel like a bad Mom. It made me feel selfish.
But then in the midst of all the guilty feelings I felt God telling me that it's ok for Mommy's to want a little time to refuel. It means that we are functioning just like we're supposed to. We are pouring our heart and soul into these little people. Just like a car needs to refuel after a while, so we need to stop and refresh ourselves every now and then. We need to take some time to rest our mind and let God refill our love tank to pour out again.
So Mommies, tomorrow...
Cuddle your little ones when they wake up.
Feed them breakfast.
Comb hair, find clothes.
Clean the floor.
Fold another load of laundry.
Fix another bottle.
Color another picture in the coloring book.
Read another story.
Sing another song.
And lots more in between.
And if you need 30 minutes to take a long hot shower every now and then after Daddy comes in, savor it. Don't feel guilty. Open yourself up to rest and peace from Jesus and let Him fill you up to do it again. It's ok to be that Mom. <3
I am on a journey to know Jesus better, and be the wife, mommy and friend that God created me to be, all within the walls of my own little home. <3